Mamma's Boy

First of all I would like to apologize for not keeping up the past couple days. I was working on this blog post because this one is probably going to be the one that really, truly, means the most to me. I'm going to start it off with a little story though. Seems right in my eyes.

I came home a couple months ago. First thing I did when I got home was give my mom a huge hug. That's pretty much what I always do when I first come home after being away for awhile, unless my mom is the one bringing me home. In that case she gets a huge hug when I first see her pull up.

I have put an incredible amount of stress on my family these past few months. With being back home, taking me places, and just having to deal with me and what I bring to the table, it isn't an easy task. I doubt it is even a enjoyable task half the time. I'm a fun guy to hang around with, but really, who wants me around 24/7.

Out of all this the one that has had my back religiously, even though she doesn't always think I know and plays off like she doesn't, is my mother. Both my mother and father are crazy for dealing with me for this long. But they love me and they care about the person I become. Both have gone completely out of their way to help me get through this thing that I have brought on myself. But I'd like to focus on my mom.

To continue with this story, mother's day happened a couple weeks ago. I asked my mom before hand what she would like for mother's day and she replied saying she would like nothing. So being a guy, I said hey I got off easy. No transportation, no money, I don't have to get anything this year. Boy was I wrong. A few days after mothers day my aunt came over and  my mother purposely brought up a flower in a cream cheese bucket. She explained to my aunt that she bought it for mother's day for herself because no one else got her anything. No one got her a card or a flower or anything. She did this right in front of me making me feel ridiculously guilty, which I should feel.

This is my attempt of a mother's day gift.

Mom, for one, I love you. You have always been there for me, thick and thin, bad and good. The tears and the smiles, I love that you haven't given up on me. You have told me stories about your pregnancy to me many times over. How you and dad prayed for a son, that acted like you and looked like dad. HEY LOOK you got what you wished for. I'm sorry I'm such a handful. I remember you telling me how many times you would blast music in your car while I kicked in your belly. You didn't think it would come back and haunt you did you? Sorry that I listen to music at obnoxious volumes blaring out of my room. I remember you telling me all the different things your craved during pregnancy. I'm sorry for coming home every day asking what to eat, I really do enjoy your cooking. It is by far the best, in the world. Mom, I'd really like to explain to you why I think your perfection wrapped into an amazing woman. Mom you fun and I love that I can talk to you about pretty much anything under the sun. I love that we can laugh and tell jokes to each other, even if we don't see eye to eye on every issue. I love how you try and brag about the good qualities I do have to family and friends, although the few qualities are growing quite scarce. I love how you got me into so much of the things that I am now interested in. I love how you guided me and helped me through everything that I've done in life. Mom you really helped me grow and I will always try and live up to what you believe I can achieve. And again, I'm sorry for falling short in many places. Basically what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry for everything, and I love you, even if I screw up and you question if I do or not. I can be a stupid kid sometimes and make some incredibly dumb decisions. I'm happy you've always been there to help me out when I'm down but I don't plan on being down for much longer. I can't wait for the day that you watch me graduated, get a real job, plan my life accordingly, come home and see you and say "Look I made it." And I love you for knowing that its going to work out for me.

I think you'd like this.

From the bottom of my heart Mom, I love you.
Happy Mother's Day, although extremely late. It means the same none-the-less.

For tonight, goodnight.

P.S. We are dancing to Meatloaf on a coffee table at my wedding (when I have one, no rush) I don't care if anyone has a problem with it. Its happening.